Step 2 & 3: Allow & Investigate

We've been getting more and more granular in my classes lately - granular in our ability to connect with the embodied experience of our lives. To someone unfamiliar with the process, becoming granular in our observances might seem inconsequential or even annoying. Perhaps its because granularity requires slowing down and fostering patience to develop this level of self awareness.

My last blog post discussed the first step of a method that helps us do this, how to recognize a shift in our internal landscape. It seems like a pretty obvious, almost automatic step, but trust me. Most people will ignore the first signs of something shifting and instead wait for it to fester and manifest into a bigger reaction later. The act of recognizing is saying, "Something is happening and this is how it is right now."

The next step, allowing, is saying "I will not fight how it is right now. I will be present here with the sensations coming up." This also seems simple, right? But again, most people sensing the initial discomfort of allowing thoughts and sensations that are causing them pain, will dip out before they can make a deeper connection with it. They lose the opportunity to know themselves in a more profound way and also lose out on learning how to comfort themselves.

But if those few initial moments can be allowed, we can then get to the next step of investigation. Investigation is not what it sounds like. It's not getting up in our head, telling ourselves the story we think makes sense. It's also not spiraling about how to solve or figure out who is responsible for our current feeling state. No, investigating is just about being curious and gentle: What's it like to experience this moment? What is it like to experience the belief that you shouldn't feel this way or that? What is it like to believe in the stories you're telling yourself? How familiar does this moment and sensation feel to you?

To really allow this practice to integrate we have to also draw our investigation into the embodied experience. In other words, we must take those questions about the most vulnerable parts of where we might feel the worst, most agitated, or sad and get curious about where it is being felt in the body. What kinds of sensations are they? Are they tight? tingly? hot? cold? Do those sensations feel big and dense or light and buzzy? Do they stay put or do they travel to other parts of the body? How familiar do these body sensations feel to you?

See what I mean by granular?

We think these moments - because they're so subtle and require such an acute moment of attention - aren't important. But I would suggest these moments are THE MOST important. They are what makes or breaks how we experience our lives. They determine if we make something an explosive experience or just an experience. These moments, if ignored, can ruin a whole day or start an argument with someone you're projecting your feelings towards. But when given attention, they can be the key to your emotional freedom.

If we remember nothing else, just remember to remain curious and gentle. Curiosity after all kills judgement. It kills judgement of our experience and it kills judgement of other peoples actions.