Ch....ch...ch...Changes

I'm not just talking about the start of school or the first summer post quarantine life.

I'm talking about the feeling of change.

How does it show up for you? I know when I tap into my body I feel it as a restriction in breathing, sometimes irritation, impatience, or jealousy. Often a knot in my belly comes along with it. Nothing in my external world seems 'wrong'. It's quite the opposite. But there's an itchy-like sensation that I will assume is the same one felt by a crab growing a new shell.

It's growth.

I think for many of us - certainly me in my former years - I didn't know what to do with that innate sense. If it ain't broke (and your bank account and inner circle approves) don't fix it. But now that I'm older, wiser, and doing THE WORK, I know if I ignore it I'll be denying my needs and desires, ultimately making myself unhappy in the process. Understanding that this sensation is truly meant for me to come into alignment with the highest expression of myself allows a switch in perspective on change from one of 'what's wrong?' to 'I'm right where I need to be'.

Here are a few things I do to help me in periods of change and/or anxiety:

1. FEEL INTO THE BODY. Everything we experience is felt and memorized by our cellular body. So when I'm caught in my own thoughts, I stop, close my eyes, and tap into my breath and where in my body I feel my own stories. I give those sensations a location, a texture, a color, or a sound. I track it as I give it time to move through my system. Once my presence is fully engaged with the FEELing, I then ask my body if there is a movement, sound, noise, or healthy action it needs to take to allow it to soften. It is sometimes as simple as letting my eyes move around the room or relaxing my lips or hands.

2. GET OUT IN NATURE. This is my favorite. My mom has told me that my great grandmother used to tell her the old saying (I'm paraphrasing), "Look at something green." And studies have shown that not only is the fresh air an obvious benefit but that the eyes, when looking at green and in longer distances (i.e. - not at a screen), does wonders for your nervous system. If there's a body of water I can walk by or jump into, it's even better.

3. TALK TO SOMEONE. But not just anyone. Talk to the people who know you well but that also make you feel like you can conquer the world. Surround yourself with people who take calculated risks and give you confidence when you become unsure. Those people are the magic and will help you make your magic.

4. MOVEMENT. Obviously, I love the yoga. But I will tap into my body first and determine what type of yoga I really need. If I'm anxious I might need something like viniyoga that first gets me to move a little faster and then slows down so I can calm my thoughts. Too, I've gotten into CrossFit this year to counterbalance my yoga practice and give me more options. I still feel inadequate in there most days, but I am so impressed by what my body and mind can accomplish together.

5. STILLNESS. Seems contradictory, right? Quiet is actually the key to "figuring it out". And it's amazing that in a society that values individualism and autonomy how deathly afraid we are of being alone with our own thoughts. I promise that time in the garden, people watching, etc., with all screens turned off and put away makes the process SO MUCH EASIER.

...I've been wanting to make some changes for a very long time now in my teaching, coaching, and life in general. And for a very long time I've not known what that looks like, existing in a space of trial and error, fear, financial insecurity, and an overall scarcity mindset. I know this sensation of change, intimately. I know how it can ebb and flow. I know the questions that arise for me/about me when it comes.

But I also know that each time it comes, I'm given the gift of dissonance and confusion as the necessary filtering system on my way to clarity and a bigger, happier version of me. I am still living by trial and error and deep in my process, but you may see me stepping into other arenas in the next few months that I hope I can be brave enough to share with you.

How do you deal with change? Please share with me.